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Saturday, 27 December 2014

Sach mein Kitna chain hota hai na sachchai mein !!!

Why do we lie? ---We lie because we are afraid and aware of our own shortcomings . We are ashamed of our faults and behaviour .

 In other words we are ashamed of ourselves --we want to hide our personality from others . Yes this is the truth --that -- WE are ASHAMED  of OURSELVES .

 I know this statement is not acceptable to  you or to anyone. It has hurt you just as it  hurt me when I was made aware of this fact . Who do you think told me this stark truth "My mother " Because mothers are those who tell us about all the TRUTHS of life ,  they know how to wrap them up in layers of love and tell us in such a way that we not only accept them but also learn and start believing and become better persons in the process.

This was when I was very small must have been ten or twelve  and had a tutor who used to come every evening and teach me for two  hours he used to help me do my home work and prepare for the next days lessons to be taught in class.

It so happened  that one day my parents had to go to a relatives place and were supposed to come very late so they did  not take me with them I was left behind in the guardianship of my Grandmother   and two of my college going uncles who were like friends to me . Now it so happened that when the teacher came that evening I locked the front door from outside and went and hid myself . When Mr Das ( my teacher ) saw the door locked from out side he went back thinking that no  one was at home.

Having fooled him and with no tutions  I had a great time playing the whole evening .

When my parents came back at night I told them I would not be going to school the next day as my homework was incomplete My dad asked me the reason of my incomplete homework and  that hadn't I told Mr Das about it ?--I said he had not come that day

So here was my second victory no tuitions and no school the next day HURRAH.

But that night I could not sleep a wink, I had nightmares of Mr Das coming and telling my parents that he had come and found the house locked , the next morning too I felt as if I was a thief  I kept on looking at my granny and the two uncles --had they seen me lock the door? ,  had they seen me play the prank ? were they aware of what I had done ? I had visions of them giving me knowing glances , I even saw them smile sarcastically  and the servants !! God  why was he going into my dad's room ? is he spilling the beans ? has he told dad about what I had done !!!! No how can he. He  hadn't seen anything .... But suppose he had seen , then ?  I would look at my dad's face whenever he crossed me Does he know ? If he called me for some work I imagined he was calling me to punish me .

Gosh.. those torturous moments ----they spread out and gulped the whole 24 hours ----every second had me breathing hard , avoiding people not being able to eat or play or enjoy my off from school .

My mother sensed  something to be the matter ----she called me asked me why I was so tensed ? why was I acting the way I was ----and I wrapped my hands around her put my face in the folds of her sari and began sobbing She was so disturbed she put her arms around me wiped my tears and asked me what the matter was .I told her everything amidst sobs she din't say a word only asked me to go and tell dad the whole story ----I went to him and started crying he asked me what the matter  was mom said I wanted to tell him something , and she left the room , leaving the two of us alone .

I was sobbing uncontrollably and somehow confessed the whole situation --he didn't say anything just patted my back and asked me never ever to lie  again .I went back to mom  she asked me if I would like to eat something as I hadn't eaten the whole day I said no .Just then my granny asked me what the matter was ? was I not well ? Oh!  so she did not know anything ?!!! that means no one had seen anything .Thank God .

I went to my room and lay down on the bed somehow I was feeling much relieved and sleep overcame me . Late at night I saw mother lying beside me and kissing my forehead. I looked at her She asked me how was I feeling I said much better then she told me all that which I have narrated in the first paragraph and asked me if I had understood those words I nodded my head and asked her for forgiveness She said no pleas were needed and everyone makes mistakes of this kind but I should now learn a lesson and never  lie in future I promised her the same and asked her if dad was angry She said no, in fact he was proud of me for having the courage to go and confess to them .

I WAS SO HAPPY AND RELIEVED  ---and at that unearthly hour I asked my mom for something to eat ; and when we both sat at the dining table she looked  at me, gobbling   all the food and remarked

Kitna chain hota hai na sachchai mein   !!!

this is my entry for the Kinley   contest on Indiblogger and the link is  Kinley 2014 TVC 

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Pre marital sex YES or NO

"Pre marital sex ---your YES or NO  to it" is the topic and my Answer is TO  EACH HIS/HEROWN

BECAUSE Its no longer a question based on morality or decency it is a matter of personal choice --the criteria to be brought into consideration is no longer the right or wrong but its what you think of it --everything is right and everything is wrong when the judge is your own view point .

Just as some people think medicines are the best way to treat  lifestyle  diseases like diabetes and cardiac problems while some advocate change in lifestyle be the actual cure BOTH are right as far as their abilities to follow a certain regime are the deciding factor .

Similarly SEX pre marital or extra marital or even current marital( I say this because there are cases of rape in marital relations too) depends on what the concerned parties think about it.

We in Indian society have always shied away from discussing this topic. Sex has always been a taboo for us --why !! even married couples are not expected to show their affection  we act as if babies are really brought by the stork and no physical or biological activity is responsible for it .

So  pre marital sex is really a debatable topic ---I personally feel that SEX as in a relationship between a man and a woman is and should be an off shoot of LOVE sex gives pleasure and satisfaction only when love is involved ----sex is a divine act,  a need , it is a precious gift to us it should not be made Carnal . It involves the act of giving,both by women and men .It involves making oneself  vulnerable and this should be done only when love and trust and faith are there .

Virginity is a precious gift which should be offered to him or her who loves you or whom you love Yes I say this for both men and women Because sex is not to be  squandered  it is to be savoured and enjoyed .and worshipped and this is possible only when you offer it to him/her whom you love .It is a new feeling which comes to humans on maturity it involves and gives  a lot of fine meanings to life.

I am sure even those people, men and women . girls and boys who have had many sexual experiences must have found the difference between that episode which was with the person whom they loved than with so many other multiple partners .

Coming to the actual topic about Premarital sex  I would discourage it because pre-marital sex even if it is with the person you are to marry --is done stealthily with a feeling of guilt which persists till the date you  finally tie the nuptial knot . both the partners are worried about being caught or about landing  in a soup .

And then there are instances when they start suspecting  each other if he/she could do it with me she/he must have done it with others too . and this is the cause of many a marital discord --let me say that Indian society and specially the Indian male is still not mature enough to accept and adjust to pre marital sex by his / her partner the element of suspicion is always there ---like I said earlier if it could be with me it could have been with some one else the element of possessiveness is so strong that partners at times cannot tolerate the other talking to the opposite gender . Flimsy reasons like a partner's friends or colleagues cause the spouse to become jealous.

And moreover where is the charm in getting married if you have gone and indulged in all post marriage activities beforehand --where is the thrill the novelty .?

But all said and done it is a persons own choice.

this is my entry for the contest Pre Marital Sex YES or NO   and the link


Thursday, 18 December 2014

Lets play --the second innings

Vacation ----yes a much needed luxury in the hectic life schedule we follow these days .

But vacations need transportation---tickets -----and that needs PLANNING  --which again is something very difficult specially if you have a family where everyone is employed in different professions and where their are two kids studying in different schools because no two people have an off together everyone has his/her own time table .

So when a sudden weekend saw that everyone had holidays coinciding with each other we decided to make use of this sudden good luck and go for a vacation ---BUT where ???? this sudden good luck wouldn't procure tickets for us nor would it get us bookings at a resort at such short notice --had we become members of Club Mahindra  some of our problems would have been solved but the fact was that we hadn't taken a membership when the offer had come our way.

 We want to go somewhere which will let us relax in the lap of nature ---more so because the children  are  with us and these modern kids are so unlucky when it comes to watching and  feeling and enjoying the bounties of mother nature ----all they get to see are pictures on TV or images on google so we want  to make them spend sometime among the beauties of natural surroundings .

So now the question is  ---Jaye toh jaye kahaan ? '

 I am suddenly reminded  of my brother --he has  always been asking us to visit his holiday home/ farm house in the outskirts of Pench National Park now a tiger reserve too  where  we used to go so often in our young days  and I am also reminded of a vacation we had with him at this  farm house when my kids were small.  I am uploading some pictures here which belong to that vacation. He had accompanied us on this particular holiday and we had had lots of fun the kids had simply loved it all -- there were two cars and an assortment of 10 people ranging from 3 years to 66 years --and mind you all young and no oldies, all absolutely fit every one of us used to go for early morning jogs  do  Pranayam and then used to take  nimbu pani --so that should make you all understand how fit we all must have been my family , my brother's family and my parents  .

Well then two cars and 10  people had  started  early in the morning --had had  breakfast of kachori , samosa and chai at a roadside dhaba ,reached the  destination in about 2 hours My brother had christened the farm house   SECOND INNINGS meaning Life's second innings and  had dedicated it to my parents  ---that time we were still playing our first innings but this time . We have entered the second innings so I want to replay the previous  innings and enjoy before life takes a fast forward and the cassette gets over .

 second innings

The above photographs remind us of the lovely time we gave the kids they learnt and saw so many things spent two full days in the lap of mother nature ---seeing mangoes growing on trees and eating them too , seeing farms , and the herd of cows ,  a real bird house   , a pair of crows .It was a real experience and many many times better and more exciting than a visit to a garden or park which is closest to nature that children in cities can  get to . Seeing monkeys sitting under a tree or dears roaming in the open is so different from  watching them in a  zoo . Why ? even the exhilarating experience of getting up in the morning is so different from the one we have in our air conditioned bedrooms .

Here are a few more photographs --which make me want to go back and spend at least a week and the next generation kids are eager too.



The kids are so excited about the holidays  they haven't stopped talking about it --These old photographs have given them so much to look forward to. What with the cows and the crows and the dears and the monkey and the lovely makeshift barbecue on the terrace. They are so busy showing off to their friends that they will be going to a Jungle Safari  ( the older one has a lesson about Pench Reserve forest in his curriculum so .....)  .

We too feel  exonerated of the guilt of  taking the kids to shopping malls , and multiplexes .And we know it will be   an absolutely novel experience for the children to see dears and monkeys and tigers out in the open and not inside the bars of a cage in  a  Zoo.--just as it was for my kids . My grandchildren will now relish and enjoy what their parents had and we, my hubby and I and my brother and his wife will experience the same pleasures that my parents had enjoyed as grandparents .

This I know would  be  a lovely  vacation and it will provide us with a "breath of fresh" air both literally and metaphorically .

this is my entry for the Teddy Travelogues contest on indiblogger

the link being

All pictures taken are from my personal collection and the people shown are my family members.

Wednesday, 3 December 2014

A Paisa Vasool flight

Why Bigger is better for Indian aviation ------Now that is not  really a difficult or Big   question to answer ---

Its all very simple the answer is ....

 We all know India is a BIG country --with,Big problems  needing Big solutions  and  the root cause of these Biig problems are  the  BiiiiiG families  which go on becoming Biiiger inspite of so many family planning programmes etc .-and even if some families are trying to curtail their size  but we still carry our legacy of travelling with Big luggage .

while travelling we like to carry .

1. food of all kinds we start preparing for the journey atleast 2 days beforehand --we take special care to take everything from salt , to sugar to raw onions and green chillies , and pickles  to puri sabzi as if we will not get any food on the route and what is more we even prepare some long forgotten delicacies just to eat them on the way --BUT we also buy the food from the vendors and the food cart.

2. Then however small the journey we always keep a needle and thread and some spare buttons  after all we may need them .

3  Some antiseptic and cotton  and bandage and paracetamol and even cotton buds ---now this is not to be blamed its okay  to carry these after all emergencies  may crop up .

4  At home we may ask granny to try and bear the pain a little but while travelling her small leg stool has to be there for her to rest her arthritic feet

5. very rarely do we travel alone except on official tours , otherwise we like to travel with the whole family and though the joint family is becoming extinct but while on a vacation we make joint ventures together with  uncles and aunts and cousins and grandparents and even a "Ramu" the ancestral servant who has been serving the family since generations and is treated like a family member  all are included --the more the merrier or the bigger the group  the better .

Its all these reasons why Bigger is better for Indian Aviation .....because its all these reasons that make us avoid air travel specially for vacations and holidays in short when we want to enjoy travelling we avoid Air Travel we don't mind spending a little more time travelling but  sitting cramped up in planes and without any proper food and not being able to chat with family or share an item is just not acceptable to us .

BUT looks like Lufthansa A380 is about to bring a change in the atmosphere ( the pun here is intended)

Its a double decker aircraft Business class seats and also Economy class have personal televisions.

Then though I have not flown in the aircraft till now,people who have used the facilities give a very bright picture of the A 380 ---flexible head rests with comfortable  and generous  reclines , extra leg room width , window seats are not necessary as there are cameras available and you can even watch the landing and the take off with the help of the three camera angles fitted outside the plane --this is a special treat for kids .The service is good and the food too is liked by all. Lufthansa first class is loved too as it has a seat and a bed per person and secondly there is convenient storage in the seat to store clothes etc and not to forget the bathroom which is very spacious and has cabinets .

The best and a unique  facility is  the Audio entertainment available with each seat in EVERY CLASS including CD and international radio channels ---now that's what I call complete Paisa Vasool .

 Paisa Vasool is a very important characteristic of us Indians 

we always keep our eyes on the perks attached more than the 
salary when we go job hunting , we go to that sale outlet which gives us ek pe ek free or to that vegetable vendor who adds that free "dhania mirchi" to our vegetable basket .Even while buying a car the one thing we are more concerned about than any other feature is---"kitna Deti Hai " meaning what is the mileage or how many kilometres per litre does it go so that we may extract the most from our rupee That according to us is the biggest perk a car can give.

So with all these added features of extra leg room , generous  reclines , good service good food extra cameras Audio entertainment , bigger bathrooms ....phew.....and so many more perks  Lufthansa A380 the largest commercial aircraft in history will be  to be a winner on the Indian sky .

This is my entry for the Lufthansa A 380 contest on Indiblogger 

hashtag  #LufthansaA380

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